SOUTH AFRICA'S 29-year-old debutant Friedel de Wet pushed England to the brink of defeat at Centurion last night with a fiery new ball spell which had 9,000 sun-baked Centurion fans on the edge of their grassy hillocks.

In the end, his phenomenal spell was not quite enough. England ended 228-9 with Graham Onions surviving a torrid last over from Makhaya Ntini to roars from the Barmy Army... and groans from the locals.

Unsung hero Paul Collingwood played his part too, looking on from the other end as the tail collapsed around him. He ended with 26 off 99, but like his obdurate resistance against Australia at the first Test in Cardiff last summer, it was worth at least twice that.

But in truth, the afternoon belonged to De Wet, who finally ended local disputes over his selection when he tore through the England late order just as safety was arriving over the cloudless horizon. Taking the new ball with England apparently secure at 205-5 with 13 overs to come, he got the stubborn Jonathan Trott, the hopeless Ian Bell and the non-batting wicketkeeper Matt Prior in quick succession.

Then, from the other end, South Africa's barely-spinning slow bowler Paul Harris got Stuart Broad to edge one and, after a painful review, he too was gone and England were 206-8. They'd lost four wickets for four runs in seven overs.

Last week there was a reported dispute between chief selector Mike Procter and coach Mickey Arthur about picking De Wet, who bowls for the Lions of Johannesburg, ahead of Wayne Parnell.

But Procter held firm and when Dale Steyn pulled up with his hamstring on the morning of the match, it was De Wet who stepped up, bowling a massive Steve Harmison-style wide with his first ball.

But he has improved steadily throughout this game and with the pitch finally showing some bounce - as opposed to the odd, low scuttler - from the Hennops River end, he came to life.

That initial new ball spell, four overs, three maidens, three wickets for two runs, will live long in the memory. First Trott hurt his thumb trying to fend off an absolute snorter and AB De Villiers took a sensational one-handed catch at first slip. Trott was gone for a fine 69 off 212 balls.

But Ian Bell, who left a straight one in the first innings, lasted just four overs before he fished at De Wet and wicketkeeper Mark Boucher took another fine, one-handed catch to his right.

Next up? Matt Prior. Our non-batting wicketkeeper. He was gone in a trice, another edge to Boucher, nine balls, no runs.

With the much-loved Ntini, winning his 100th cap here, having no such luck with the new ball, captain Graeme Smith turned to his gentle spinner Paul Harris, who took five wickets in the first innings. And it worked a treat. Stuart Broad, who relishes situations like this, prodded at Harris's fourth ball and the entire team of close-in fielders went up, as did the umpire's finger.

Broad, on nought, nil, nada, quack-quack after seven balls, demanded a review - his father Chris is, after all, a match referee and he'd felt hard-done-by first time round - but the television just confirmed what we knew already. A substantial touch to Boucher, who had now taken three catches in four overs.

But of course, England's secret weapon had yet to come out to join the canny Collingwood, who got a quiet half-century in the first innings.

Graeme Swann. Five wickets in the first innings, none in the second. A Test-best 85 in the first innings and a massive job to do here with seven-and-a-half overs left. The crowd were in good voice, the Barmy Army attempting to out-sing the locals. Bedlam. Everyone had been asleep half an hour before.

While Durham’s Graham Onions sat nervously in the dressing room to our right, Swann and Collingwood plugged away, attempting to stem De Wet's tide and seeing off Harris.

Six to go, five to go, four... but then Smith turned to Morne Morkel, his third paceman. Remember, the injured Steyn is currently the world’s No1.

And bang, with his fifth ball, he catches Swann in front. The finger goes up. They call for a review, but it’s too close. We have to stick with the on-field umpire. He’s gone for two off 22 balls.

Onions to face Morkel’s final ball. He survives.

Three to go. One wicket to fall.

Before De Wet’s arrival, this game had been dead, killed by the two South Africa-born batsman, Kevin Pietersen and Trott.

Even when KP ran himself out suicidally an over after tea for a fine 81, England still looked safe at 4-172. The crowd were starting to go home, the caterers were packing up.

But while we fiddled, Friedel burned with ambition. And when the new ball was thrown to him, he finally produced the kind of bowling South Africa have been calling out for throughout this sun-burnt Test.

So to the penultimate over. Onions survives three from Morkel with reasonable aplomb but then, inexplicably, takes a single off the fourth, a Yorker which nearly squirted through.

Collingwood goes for the single off the fifth... hoping to face De Wet’s last over. But he overcooks it. The ball reaches the boundary and he’s sent back with another four to his name, and he can’t get the last one away.

So it’s Onions to face the final over from Makhaya the Magnificent. Controversially, De Wet is rested after a spell of seven overs, 3-11. I’ll take you through it.

1: Gets a bat on a widish one, but not the full bat.

2: Plays and misses. Close to an edge. We’re all edgy.

3: Solid, right behind a good ball.

4: Gets a bat on it in front of his pads, plumb in front.

5: Solid, could have had a single cover.

6: A huge roar from the Barmy Army as Onions survives. He turns to the flag-waving Brits in their corner, and shows a fist. He’s done it. A 12-ball knock for one run, but it’s worth a roar. England have survived for a draw.

We live to fight another day. In Durban on Boxing Day for the second Test, where rain is predicted.

Labels: centurion, devastating new ball spell, england cricket, friedel de wet, graeme swann, neal collins south africa, Paul Collingwood

STRANGE isn’t it? Two men playing against the country of their birth are so determined to resist in front of their former compatriots. And the two Englishmen we saw early today, James Anderson and Alastair Cook, produced a couple of airy-fairy shots to go and sit comfortably in the shade of the dressing-room while the heat is on.

At tea Jonathan Trott (53 off 148 balls) and Kevin Pietersen (80 off 136) had pushed England from 27-3 to 169-3, an unbroken partnership of 142. Safety looms, though Pietersen ran himself out for 81 an over after the second interval and Trott was brilliantly caught by, one-handed by AB De Villiers at first slip off Friedel De Wet for 61 - and went of nursing a bruised thumb from a superb, rising delivery, the 212th Trott received.

That leaves two lilly-white Englishmen, Paul Collingwood and Ian Bell, who left a straight one in the first innings, to see out the last 13 overs of the fifth day to ensure a drawn first Test with the score 209-5.

But what British stiff-upper-lip Trott and Pietersen displayed! What true English blitz spirit! And of course, they're both South African reared.

Nightwatchman Anderson, judging by his twitter this morning, was more intent on getting back to find a television by lunch-time. He said: “Huge day today. Wolves v Burnley 1.30pm.”

After Andrew Strauss’s departure last night, Anderson and Cook were out in the first hour with just 27 on the board, 336 still needed. All looked lost, a growing Sunday crowd were having their time in the sun. Then Cape Town-born Trott got his head down and was joined by Pietermaritzburg-born Kevin Pietersen and the resistance grew. And grew.

As I wandered around this magnificent ground, all grass banks, paddling pools and beer, the South Africans were getting remarkably uptight. About 10,000 of them have disturbed their traditional pre-Christmas Sunday braai (or barbecue) to witness England, the old enemy around these parts, crushed.

Instead they were forced to witness two of their own, batting proudly for queen and country, soaking up the pressure and pushing England towards a draw. In their charming double-storey executive boxes, which look like Victorian houses, and on their picnic blankets, I recognise the words from the bearded men as they see yet another appeal turned down. Bitter words. Angry phrases from a near-forgotten childhood.

It’s not hard to understand their discomfort. The Afrikaans curses shouted loudly across the ground are understandable. In short: Centurion, once known as Verwoerdburg, lies next to Pretoria, the heart of Afrikanerdom. They were never too keen on the “rooineks” (red necks) here. Not since we built a concentration camp in nearby Irene, about a mile away, during the Boer War 110 years ago and left the local populace in small-pox infected misery. Okay, it's ancient history to most, but the vast graveyard and memorial, next to Irene Primary School, is barely a six-hit away. It holds the graves of the 1,149 mostly women and children who died there.

So this is no fun for the folks gathered here, large people, large appetites, large opinions. And not all of them modern, democratic thinkers. Things have changed, the nation is rainbow-coloured, but the last thing they need is for two turncoats from the coastal regions to push this game beyond South Africa’s reach. I’m amazed they’ve been so gentle on this pair, considering.

The South Africans on the field are little happier. Even Jacques Kallis, supposedly not allowed to bowl because of the rib he fractured in October, demanded a go at this pair. And he got nowhere. At tea he had figures of 3-1-5-0. And the misery goes on for the locals.

Early on, things were unpleasant for England and their tiny Barmy Army after the first overnight rain of this sun-soaked Test. The ball was flying around, it was pleasantly cool for the fielding side. But Anderson, who gloved Friedel de Wet to Mark Boucher 13 balls into day five, produced an avoidable dismissal.

The gormless Cook followed soon afterwards, caught by South African captain Graeme Smith at gully off Paul Harris. What is the point of Cook? He's earmarked to captain the side in Bangladesh on their next tour but hasn't got to 50 since Lord's against the Australians. He looks good, sounds good... but he's no Test opener at the moment. He looked terrified coming out to bat last night.

The irrepressible Graeme Swann, whose five wickets and Test-best 85 carried his side through the first three days of this Test, twittered a more positive: “Three things I want to see today. Jimmy get a fifty, Cookie a hundred and the Toon smash the Smoggies.”

Only the last of those is now a realistic option. For our foreign readers the words “Toon smash the Smoggies” constitute a Geordie phrase roughly equivalent to “the once-great Newcastle beat never-great Middlesbrough in the second tier of English football which nobody cares about”.

Of far more importance to lovers of real football was Arsenal’s 3-0 win over those niggling, nasty men from the fires of Hull. It closes the gap on Manchester United – smashed by Fulham, 3-0 (yes, that's 3-0) – and extends the lead over Liverpool – beaten 2-0 by bottom club Portsmouth (yes, that's 2-0).

Which just leaves Chelsea to lose to West Ham today, just after this absorbing Test draws to a close this afternoon. And yes, it’s all true. Mark Hughes is gone despite yesterday’s goal-happy 4-3 win over Sunderland which left Manchester City handily placed in sixth. His replacement? Roberto Mancini. So that means City are are in trouble.

And is my precious book, A GAME APART. It was published two days ago. Sales have reached a feverish 14 in two days despite emails to all my mates, constant blogging and attempts to bring people into my web-site with pathetic twittering. My wife threatens to cut people's hair badly in her salon if they won't buy.

But it isn't working. Please help. Behind me, the Johannesburg Star's Kevin McCallum sold 40,000 copies of his sports trivia book. I need 39,986 of you to help. It's the book you must read before the World Cup. If you want. It's not expensive. My wife liked it. Just go to http://www.authorhouse.com/bookstore/ItemDetail.aspx?bookid=68412

Labels: england cricket tour, first test, friedel de wet, graeme swann, Ian bell, jimmy anderson, jonathan trott, kevin pietersen, master plan, neal collins south africa, Paul Collingwood

GRAEME SWANN'S press conference last night (above) at the end of day three was, as you might expect, a little out of the ordinary. And then came the chat afterwards. On Twitter last night, these little gems: "I'm going to have another room date with Cookie tonight. If it ain't broke..." (a reference to a jokey twitter over his feelings for one Alastair Cook earlier in the week). That came after: "In the words of George, in Blackadder goes forth as gorgeous georgina...i feel fantastic!" best No9 bat in the world. And on hearing Australia captain Ricky Ponting had batted in that position yesterday against the West Indies and made just 2, Swann gloated last night: "How many did he get? Draw your own conclusions."

Labels: england cricket tour, graem swann, jimmy anderson, neal collins south africa, paul harris

FORGET all the bickering about Stuart Broad falling victim to the controversial Umpire Decision Referral System. And ignore the fact that Ian Bell produced perhaps the worst leave in the history of Test cricket to be bowled by a straight one.

Let’s concentrate instead on the record-breaking ninth wicket partnership between Graeme Swann and Jimmy Anderson (right) which left these cocky, sun-burnt South Africans tearing their bleached hair out. At the close on day three of the first Test, the unhappy hosts were 9-1 after facing four overs – a lead of just 71 with the heroic Anderson bowling Ashwell Prince for a duck off an inside edge in the first over of their second innings. Magnificent. And the Barmy Army in full voice: “Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy Anderson...”

When Swann, England’s best player every day so far, and Anderson got together, Broady had just been given the electronic finger by television umpire Amiesh Saheba. ‘Real’ umpire Aleem Dar gave the Nottinghamshire paceman not out when he was rapped on the pads by the innocuous slow bowling of JP Duminy with England teetering on 242-7, 176 runs behind.

The South Africans had a chat and 34 seconds later, they decided to appeal – and Broad was gone, a victim of Hawkeye, 242-8. Furious, he appealed to the umpires but high in the stands, it was television official Amiesh Saheba who needed a talking to.

And Broad did exactly that – he had what is best described as an “animated chat” with Saheba and match referee Roshan Mahanama in the television decision room. Stuart’s dad Chris, of course, is a well-known match referee and former Test opener. Broad apparently feels the South Africans had been given a signal from the dressing-room after coach Mickey Arthur had seen the replay, which may not be in the spirit of the rules.

By then, England’s hopes of getting within a hundred of South Africa’s 418 looked all but over. But Swann – who has been known to open the batting for Notts in Twenty20 thrashes - and regular nightwatchman Anderson obviously hadn’t been told that. From 242-8 they took England to the undreamt of heights of 348-9. Incredible.

Their partnership, which endured and flourished despite the taking of the new ball, represents the best ever penultimate pairing on this ground and for Swann, it was a Test best.

Anderson was finally out, miscueing one to Morne Morkel at mid-on off Ntini, for 29, just three short of his Test best, having survived 78 balls and hit a memorable six. The partnership, also England’s best for the ninth wicket against South Africa, was worth 106 in 23 overs at an astonishing rate of 4.54 an over, rapid for this Test.

And then, with Swannie on 81 not out at the other end, last man Graham Onions thrashed Ntini for four off his fourth ball. Great stuff! It couldn’t last though. Swann – on a career best 85 off 81 balls - was chasing it and finally put Harris into Graeme Smith’s grateful hands at deep mid-wicket.

Suddenly, the Test wasn’t quite over, the lead was down to 62.

There were snorts of derision when Bell left a straight one from Paul Harris, assuming he might actually turn the ball. It just went straight on and bowled him. Harris ended with five wickets when he got Swannie at last. And he’s more Ashley Giles than Muttiah Muralitharan, this fellow.

The once-docile first Test pitch, which allowed the home side to plod along to 418, initially gave way to a day-three demon which claimed captain Andrew Strauss just seven overs into the morning session, having added just two runs to his impressive overnight 44.

It was drinks all round as Makhaya Ntini, on his 100^th appearance, got one to zip through low beneath Strauss’s desperate defence to rattle the furniture. Sponsors Castle lager are offering a free beer to everyone in the ground when Ntini takes a wicket. The Barmy Army were first in the queue, despite their chronic disappointment.

Suddenly the ease with which Strauss and Trott added 63 in 17 overs last night was forgotten. Ntini ran to sun-soaked fans, arms raised. His 389^th wicket puts him one closer to Shaun Pollock’s South African record of 421 Test victims. Not a bad morning for South Africa’s first black cricketer, who had earlier received a congratulatory letter from Nelson Mandela, the former President who brought peace to this nation and added colour to their sports teams in 1993. But he had to wait all day for number 390 when he finally got Anderson.

Following Johannesburg-born Strauss’s departure, Pietermaritzburg-born Pietersen came out to join Cape Town-born Trott. The only non-South African on the field? Harris, born in Salisbury, Rhodesia, now known as Harare, Zimbabwe.

Pietersen got a remarkably gentle welcome from the Centurion fans. The lack of boos was probably down to the free-flowing booze being handed out to the gathering of about 5,000.

Trott and Pietersen did their best to handle the conditions, surviving the odd shooter but looking distinctly uncomfortable until the arrival of the very ordinary spinner Harris.

Then Trott made the mistake of thinking Harris could turn the ball. He charged down the pitch, took a huge heave allowing for spin... and the ball simply kept dead straight and caught the top of his leg stump.

Just as Pietersen was getting into his stride. Morkel got one to nip, got an inside edge... and Pietersen was bowled for 40.

Worse was to follow. Ian Bell, who should have made way for all-rounder Luke Wright or seamer Ryan Sidebottom here, chose to shoulder arms to a straight one. Once more he must have assumed Harris actually turns the ball. It didn’t deviate, it just went straight on into the stumps. Fool!

Harris must have thought Christmas had come early when, after facing 34 balls and scoring four runs, Matt Prior finally decided to have a go and popped one into the hands of Friedel de Wet.

And Harris’s tally went to four when, an over later, he actually turned one and Jacques Kallis took the catch at first slip to dismiss Paul Collingwood for a fine 50 off 87 balls as England slumped to 221-7.

The review system put paid to Stuart Broad’s resistance. He went for 17 and Duminy, another average bowler, had his first wicket. But it didn’t end there. Swann and Anderson came together and made the so-called batsmen look silly with a range of shots which made the pitch look oh-so-easy.

And there was still time to take that vital South African wicket at the end. Game on.

Labels: ashwell prince, england cricket tour, graeme swann, jimmy anderson, neal collins south africa, record ninth wicket partnership

STUART BROAD’S brave resistance was ended by Hawkeye at Centurion today as the controversial Umpire Decision Referral System left England reeling once more.

Umpire Aleem Dar gave the Nottinghamshire paceman not out when he was rapped on the pads by the innocuous slow bowling of JP Duminy with England teetering on 242-7.

The South Africans had a chat and 34 seconds later, they decided to appeal – and despite the ball appearing to pitch outside the line of off-stump, Broad was given the electronic finger. Furious, he appealed to the umpires but high in the stands, it was television official Amiesh Saheba who needed a talking to.

And Broad did exactly that – we’ve just seen him walking out of the television replay room here. His dad Chris, of course, is a well-known match referee and former Test opener. Broad jnr apparently feels the South Africans had been given a signal from the dressing-room, which is against the rules.

By then, England’s hopes of reaching parity with South Africa were all but over. At 281-8 with Graeme Swann (a startlingly confident 29) and Jimmy Anderson (a nearly as good 18) battling on, they are still 141runs behind thanks to a very average spinner and aided by the suicidal efforts of Ian Bell and Matt Prior.

There were snorts of derision when Bell left a straight one from Paul Harris, assuming he might actually turn the ball. It just went straight on and bowled him. Harris has 4-90. And he’s more Phil Tufnell than Muttiah Muralitharan, this fellow.

The once-docile first Test pitch, which allowed the home side to plod along to 418, has given way to a day-three demon which claimed captain Andrew Strauss just seven overs into the morning session, having added just two runs to his impressive overnight 44.

It was drinks all round as Makhaya Ntini, on his 100^th appearance, got one to zip through low beneath Strauss’s desperate defence to rattle the furniture. Sponsors Castle lager are offering a free beer to everyone in the ground when Ntini takes a wicket. The Barmy Army were first in the queue, despite their chronic disappointment.

Suddenly the ease with which Strauss and Trott added 63 in 17 overs last night was forgotten. Ntini ran to sun-soaked fans, arms raised. His 389^th wicket puts him one closer to Shaun Pollock’s South African record of 421 Test victims. Not a bad morning for South Africa’s first black cricketer, who had earlier received a congratulatory letter from Nelson Mandela, the former President who brought peace to this nation and added colour to their sports teams in 1993.

Following Johannesburg-born Strauss’s departure, Pietermaritzburg-born Pietersen came out to join Cape Town-born Trott. The only non-South African on the field? Harris, born in Salisbury, Rhodesia, now known as Harare, Zimbabwe.

Pietersen got a remarkably gentle welcome from the Centurion fans. The lack of boos was probably down to the free-flowing booze being handed out to the gathering of about 5,000.

Trott and Pietersen did their best to handle the conditions, surviving the odd shooter but looking distinctly uncomfortable until the arrival of the very ordinary spinner Harris.

Then Trott made the mistake of thinking Harris could turn the ball. He charged down the pitch, took a huge heave allowing for spin... and the ball simply kept dead straight and caught the top of his leg stump.

Just as Pietersen was getting into his stride. Morkel got one to nip, got an inside edge... and Pietersen was bowled for 40.

Worse was to follow. Ian Bell, who should have made way for all-rounder Luke Wright or seamer Ryan Sidebottom here, chose to shoulder arms to. Once more he must have assumed Harris actually turns the ball. It didn’t deviate, it just went straight on into the stumps. Incredible.

Harris must have thought Christmas had come early when, after facing 34 balls and scoring four runs, Matt Prior finally decided to have a go and popped one into the hands of Friedel de Wet.

And Harris’s tally went to four when, an over later, he actually turned one and Jacques Kallis took the catch at first slip to dismiss Paul Collingwood (above) for a fine 50 off 87 balls as England slumped to 221-7.

The review system put paid to Stuart Broad’s resistance. Despite the ball pitching outside off-stump, he went for 17 and JP Duminy, another average spinner, had his first wicket. It’s painful to watch. But Swann and Anderson were soon showing the so-called batsmen how to go about it, plundering late runs and closing the gap as day three drifted to a sweaty close.

Labels: argument, england cricket tour, Ian bell, neal collins south africa, Paul Collingwood umpire, stuart broad

GRAEME SWANN take a bow. Rarely in the history of spin bowling have so many overs been bowled in such heat for so few. And he ended with his third five-wicket haul in Test cricket. Ignore the fact England have lost Alastair Cook early in their reply, Swann is the man.

Not only did his 45 miserly overs in extreme temperatures keep England in touch with South Africa, who were all out for 418 when many were predicting a score of 500-plus. His 5-110 also ended the Bore War, which broke out around tea-time when the South African tail-enders decided to strangle the first Test.

In Perth this morning, Chris Gayle hit the fifth fastest hundred in Test history with a 70-ball whirlwind against Australia. In direct contrast, Paul Harris (38 off 89 balls) and debutant Friedel de Wet (20 off 67) barely produced an attacking shot in a ninth wicket partnership worth 37 off nearly 17 overs in a bizarre attempt to put a crowd of 9,000 to sleep all at once. In the 10 overs before tea, they scored 11. Ho-hum.

Oh for a Gayle force to blow here. But when England came in to bat, such feats looked a very distant prospect. Makhaya Ntini, winning his 100^th cap, came roaring in and had Cook dropped in the first over, right through the hands of AB De Villiers at third slip.

De Wet was less boring with the ball than the bat. His first delivery in Test cricket was a massive leg side wide in the Steve Harmison style. His second beat Andrew Strauss all ends up.

But after that dodgy start, England’s opening pair began to settle until the sixth over when, with England on 25, Cook got the slightest of edges to De Wet and wicketkeeper Mark Boucher, out for a painful 49 in earlier the day, snaffled the catch. No pesky review required.

Cook had been looking good until that point, cracking three fours and scoring 15 off 17 balls while Strauss stayed in his shell. With a minimum of 20 overs remaining, England are 26-1 - any further losses would seriously take the gloss of England’s efforts in the field.

Jimmy Anderson may have turned the course of this game when he had the heroic Jacques Kallis, who looked like he could bat forever despite a rib injury, caught at second slip by Paul Collingwood for 120 early in the day.

But Swann’s effort was quite incredible and Onions, 3-86, bowling with a calf strain, deserves a mention too. Paul Collingwood picked up a record-equalling four catches - only Marcus Trescothick has taken as many in the outfield in an England innings – against mighty Zimbabwe in 2003.

Labels: boucher, england cricket tour, graeme onions, graeme swann, jacques kallis, neal collins south africa, paul harris

ENGLAND got the big wicket of South African hero Jacques Kallis early on another blisteringly hot day at Centurion this morning.

Jimmy Anderson may have turned the course of this game when he had the big man, who looked like he could bat for ever, caught at second slip by Paul Collingwood.

Then Graeme Swann got rid of JP Duminy off his first over of the day – just as he did yesterday – and Collingwood picked up a record-equalling fourth catch in the innings to leave South Africa 316-6.

That wasn’t a bad effort from England – but it could have been even better if Graeme Onions hadn’t dropped Mark Boucher off Stuart Broad, a dolly which would have left South Africa teetering on 319-7.

And tempers became frayed when the review system saw both Boucher and Morkel reprieved as Swann turned up the heat. By lunch, South Africa were 330-6, but on another day, with a little more luck and without the review system, they might have been skittled this morning.

Kallis, who single-handedly turned the game around when South Africa were wobbling on 93-3, had added only eight to his overnight 112 when his 306-minute innings came to an end. His 120 off 225 balls featured that huge six off Graeme Swann yesterday and 16 fours.

And all this when the world's best all-rounder is, literally, half-fit. The rib injury he picked up during the Champions League thrashabout in October means he will probably not be able to bowl here.

For Collingwood, it was a third outfield catch - that's worth a jug in club cricket - and for Anderson this vital scalp was his first Test victim since Edgbaston during the Ashes clashes. He went wicketless at Headingley and The Oval as the Australians were shot down in flames by Stuart Broad and Co.

The ball that got Kallis was a peach, pitched up with a hint of away swing as Anderson bowled his fourth over of the day. As Allan “White Lightning” Donald said last night, England’s attack needs a little more consistency, a little more patience. And a few more full-pitched deliveries to give the ball air to swing.

But despite that breakthrough, which left South Africa 283-5, there was little relief for England beneath the cloudless African sky. Wicketkeeper Mark Boucher, no slouch with the bat, was next up to join JP Duminy, who had just moved to his fifty at the other end after adding 124 runs off 42 overs with Kallis at a rate of less than three an over.

A nine-hour flight away in Perth this morning, Chris Gayle hit the fifth fastest century in Test cricket for the West Indies against Australia this morning, reaching three figures of 70 balls. Now that's a strike rate.

But England, as Graeme Swann pointed out last night, are stubbornly refusing to let South Africa run away with this Test. Broad is maintaining an economy rate of 1.88 and the rest of the attack can all claim to keep things under 3.5 an over, apart from the part-time dobblers of Jonathan Trott.

Onions, staging a miraculous recovery from yesterday's calf problem, nearly had Duminy in the 16th over of the day with the score rising over 300, but the edge fell two inches short of Collingwood - who else? - at second slip. At the other end Boucher did what he always does, scoring quickly and piling up the pressure on England.

But Collingwood was perfectly positioned for his fourth catch – engineered by the breakthrough specialist Swann in his first over the morning, the 18^th of the day.

His second ball got some bite and his fifth ball, perfectly flighted, actually got some turn. Duminy prodded, Collingwood pounced and Duminy goes for 56 off 150 balls, the highlight of which was a clubbed six off Swann yesterday afternoon. Revenge is sweet.

Swann, who issued this bizarre twitter yesterday “have just had a lovely room date with Cookie. We ate steak and watched bear grylls. He'd be my ideal man, if I kicked with the other foot”, continued to find turn.

But the big chance for wicket number seven fell to Onions on the fine leg boundary with South Africa on 319-6. Boucher top-edged a short one from Broad, the ball dropped neatly into the hands, but Onions, spilled it... and Broad had both hands on his head as the ball trickled over the boundary rope.

Boucher survived a big shout on 323 when he appeared to edge the ball onto his boot off Swann to... yes, that man Collingwood. But the review showed the ball touched the ground as it hit the boot, and Collingwood’s hopes of being the first ever England player to take five outfield catches are dashed. For now.

Even more galling for England was the apparent dismissal of Morne Morkel just before lunch. Swann, bowling like a dream, rapped him on the pads right in front... the finger went up, but the South Africans called for a review. Incredibly, the ball was shown by Hawkeye to be going just over the top of the bails. Morkel, like Ashwell Prince yesterday, survived the raising of the finger. It doesn’t feel right, though I guess you can’t argue with the system.

The interesting thing for England is how much turn Swann is getting. After 30 over, he’s got 3-65... it could so easily have been five or six.

Labels: centurion, graeme swann, jacques kallis, neal collins south africa

SO this is rapidly becoming the Jekyll and Hyde tour. One minute England are absolute rubbish, bring 'em home, drop the lot. Then they're unbeatable, superb, give them all a knighthood.

Labels: england one-day international, jonathan trott, neal collins south africa, port elizabeth

GRAEME SMITH came perilously close to accusing England's four South African-born players of being too keen on "fancy glasses and flashy cars" before tomorrow's massive third One-Day International at Newlands.

Labels: andrew strauss, david lloyd, england world, geoffrey boycott, graeme smith, jonathan trott, kevin pietersen, matt prior, neal collins south africa